Here�s 10 reasons you need to teach your kids about the sanctity of marriage -particularly the wedding gown. Your wedding day is supposed to be a sweet and special day that you will remember for the rest of your life. Unfortunately, people with no class rarely gain any just because they�re tying the knot.
10 ) The Detroit Special
Ordinarily I find the term ghetto to be a little offensive, but in this case, is there really a better term?
9 ) (Not) The Dream Team
Nothing says �I�ll never be more than a two-bit trophy wife, nor will I ever move out of my crummy city� than a dress sporting your favorite sports team.
8 ) The �Wait, You Wanted It To Look Like That?
While I love how many brides have been turning away from white, there�s a point where you say �Do I want to look like I skinned a flamingo?� The answer should always be �no.�
7 ) The �Camel Toe & Side Boob Together At Last�
First off, shorts and camel toe are never a good look for your wedding. Second, when the top looks like suspenders carefully hovering over your nipples, I pray you�re marrying someone as tasteless as yourself -say Michael Jackson?
6 ) The �Is That A Doily You�re Wearing?�
Can you say say slizz-ut? It looks like someone hit her with a net gun and she just decided to work it as a gown.
5 ) The Private Dancer
Thank you to Shessoghetto.wordpress.com for the highlights on the viewer�s faces. Seriously, the expressions at this showgirl�s wedding are great.
4 ) The �Make Papa Hefner Proud�
Anyone knick named Tit�s McGee is not known for her class and elegance. Seriously, this dress looks like a champagne glass trying to serve as the Hoover dam.
3 ) The �When I grow up, I wanna be Chelsea Charms.�
I�d love to see her get in a fight with Tits McGee over who looks beter with their obscenely non-existent tops laid out.
2 ) The �Mommy Taught Me Right�
Tacky crystals and a huge train don�t trick anyone into thinking your dress is less tramp y.
If you�re wondering what her mother would say, check out this respectful and demure mother of the bride dress. Yes, it does run in the family.
1 ) The �How Much Did Your Wife Cost?�
Russian brides rarely come this easy. Is she going to a wedding or to an auction block?
At least there�s a back to the dress�kind of.